A limiting belief is a false generalization about reality that causes you to freeze up when it would be more intelligent to act. Limiting beliefs cause you to miss opportunities. Your career and relationships will surely stagnate. The truth behind this false belief is that while some mistakes can have huge negative consequences, most mistakes are minor and serve as good learning experiences for us.
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Podcast: Play in new window Download. Many of you have used the Lefkoe Belief Process and found that permanently getting rid of beliefs has made a profound difference in your life. Did you know that The Lefkoe Method includes eight other processes you can use to make significant changes in your life?
Depending on the problem you are trying to get rid of and what you are trying to accomplish, some of these other processes might be required. Moreover, I am quite confident that no one offers as complete an arsenal of processes to help you make any change you want in your life … and have it stick.
Most of our undesirable behavior and feelings ultimately can be traced to our beliefs, so being able to get rid of beliefs will make the biggest long-term difference in your life.
A belief, as I use the term, is a statement about reality that is the truth for us. It is experienced emotionally as the truth, because it is possible to intellectually disagree with something we believe.
So the way to know you have a belief is to say the words of the belief out loud and then ask yourself: Do the words feel true? Do they resonate even a little bit? Do they feel even a little uncomfortable? Most of our core beliefs about ourselves, people, and life are formed in the first six years of life as a result of interactions with our parents.
Beliefs about other areas of life—such as work, politics, relationships, and aspects of society—usually are formed when we encounter them. When you make that distinction, the belief is transformed into merely one interpretation you gave a meaningless series of events, and the belief disappears. Many day-to-day problems that we face—such as procrastination, selling ourselves short, and trying to impress others—can usually be resolved by eliminating the beliefs that cause them.
Many emotions are caused by beliefs, for example, the belief that Dogs are dangerous will result in an emotion of fear when confronting a dog. When the beliefs are eliminated, the emotions usually will be also. There are many adults, however, who experience emotions that appear to not depend on beliefs. Very often we experience negative feelings in our life on a recurring basis, such as fear, anger, guilt, anxiety, and sadness.
We experience these feelings every time specific events or circumstances occur, such as fear whenever we make a mistake or someone gets angry at us, or guilt whenever we are asked to do something. In many cases the events that stimulate the feeling in us do not produce the same feeling in others, and vice versa. Why, for example, does an event that is not inherently fearful produce fear in some people and not in others? What appears to have happened is anything that occurs repeatedly or even once if the incident is traumatic enough at the same time that something else is causing an emotion will itself get conditioned to produce the same emotion.
The classic example of this was an experiment a psychologist named Pavlov conducted with dogs. When presented with food, the dogs salivated. Then a bell was rung just prior to presenting the dogs with food. After numerous presentations of the food with the bell, the bell was rung and no food was delivered. The dogs salivated anyway, because they had associated the bell with the food. In other words, a stimulus that normally would not produce a response does so because it gets associated with a stimulus that does produce a response.
In other words, the stimulus gets conditioned. Imagine that I handed you an ice cream cone with one hand and made a fist with my other hand and drew it back as if to hit you. What would you probably feel? Now imagine that the next few times someone handed you an ice cream cone, the same thing happened and you felt anxious each time. What do you think you would feel the next time you were handed an ice cream cone, even if there was no menacing fist?
If this next time there was no fist, only ice cream, why would you feel anxious? Because the ice cream cone got conditioned to produce fear when it became associated with the fist. Something was scaring you the fist and ice cream just happened to be there every time you got scared by the fist. Here is a real life example: Consider someone who experiences fear whenever he is asked to do something.
When did he first experience fear associated with being asked to do something? Assume the original source of the fear was a father who always yelled, threatened, and terrified the client as a child. No matter what the client did, the father was not satisfied.
When the client reviews the cause of his feeling of fear, he discovers that the fear was not inherent in being asked to do something. No love, no care; no care, no survival. That is what caused the fear.
Can you see that fear is not inherent in not doing things perfectly or, in fact, any other specific thing you do or do not do? It is simpler to use than the LBP and usually takes only five to ten minutes to completely de-condition the stimuli that cause such emotions as fear, anxiety, anger and guilt. The original cause of the fear was the meaning you attributed to the way you were asked to do something the anger that accompanied the request , by someone whose survival you depended on your father.
When the association is broken, when you realize that you made this arbitrary association, the events that got associated being asked to do something will no longer cause fear.
When you consciously make a distinction between what really caused the feeling initially and the events that happened to be associated with it, the associated events current stimuli for the feeling will no longer cause the feeling.
It is important to realize that most of our emotional problems—such as anxiety, depression, anger, and sadness—cannot be eliminated totally merely by eliminating beliefs. You also have to use the Lefkoe Stimulus Process. These weekly blog posts also exist as podcasts.
Sign up for the RSS feed or at iTunes to get the podcasts sent to you weekly. Can anyone clear to me. What does it really to be good enough? I seriously doubt it is misinterpreted by many. I have been reading your website now for a week and did the eliminating beliefs and have felt a shift but i realize theres a lot more to go.
I do find the whole thing fascinating and hope to do the paying course but monies tight still hopefully it will happen, i live in Ireland and have never heard of this. I also have started reading your podcasts and have found none so far on food, diet etc as i,am getting older my health is important but i cant seem to loose the weight or eat the foods i should.
I would really appreciate any comments about this, thanks Clare. I really felt that an old vibration was put off and a new space for completude had been opened in my inner world just to felicitate my new life purpose. To get free from guilt, anger, anxiety or others sensations is part of a a deep effort of those who desire life in its great meaning. We can not live just passing by!!!
We must desire better view of ourselves, ready to change and also with permission to be changed. You showed us how to sink deep into ourselves, not to destroy concepts but to be able to feel the biggest force of our souls- the change determined by the wish!
You really found THE way! Or maybe felt it passing through your thoughts. Not only other way, but the exact atitude to help us get rid of desagreable things that had been bothering us for hole life.
Thank you. Powerful essay. Retsy, I, too,have read my share of self-help books including Self-Matters by Dr. Phil McGraw. Phil has you write out experiences from different ages, then identify the person you felt was most responsible for how you are, write a letter, burn it, and forgive them.
Then, you go into identifying what you can do in your life to make things better. Eagerly awaiting next mail. Maybe after that, I will be able to put my questions in correct words. Notify me of followup comments via e-mail. Previous Next. Related Posts. Ragini August 12, at am - Reply.
Hi Morty, I have been reading your website now for a week and did the eliminating beliefs and have felt a shift but i realize theres a lot more to go. Marcia November 15, at pm - Reply. Steve November 15, at am - Reply. Morty Lefkoe November 15, at am - Reply. Hi Steve, You would get conditioned to experience fear whenever you were told to do something.
Love, Morty. Retsy November 10, at am - Reply. Lauren November 10, at pm - Reply. Leave A Comment Cancel reply Comment.
Re-Create Your Life: Transforming Your Life And Your World With The Lefkoe Method
You wake up in the morning feeling depressed. Motivation is non-existent when you finally pull yourself out of bed. Perhaps you notice your reflection in the mirror and cringe. The world is a mess as you turn on the morning news as you start getting dressed.
How Can I Use The Lefkoe Method? Part 1
Because these methods try to help you cope with or eliminate your symptoms , but they never eliminate the cause of those symptoms, which is like building a house on a shaky foundation. The Lefkoe Method TLM enables you to replace the foundation by eliminating the causes of our problems: limiting beliefs and emotional conditioning. And that allows you to build a new house with a firm foundation that can weather any storm. You get change that lasts.